And Now Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Program

And Now Back To Our Regularly Scheduled Program

Well, after a hiatus of about 3 1/2 months, I'm back. Sorry for the long absence, but there were other things which required nearly all of my attention. And as much as I enjoy blogging, and I do (I mean, where else can I go off on random, anger-inspired rants about shit no one else really cares about but want to listen to any way . . . besides the Republican National Convention), there are times when you simply have to make priorities and stick to them.

In my case, the biggest and most immediate priority since my last post was that whole getting married 'thing.' Yes, Journey and I have finally married! And we couldn't be happier. There were a few little glitches during the ceremony, but nothing we couldn't deal with and nothing BIG went wrong. That's about the best one can ask for, really. So, a few little snags aside, everything was great. Even the weather worked with us, which was good because we got married and had the reception outside. Tucson is normally in the mid- to high-80s by mid-May (we got married on May 17), which is livable, was still warm. The day of the ceremony it actually topped out in low-80s, and since we had the ceremony early evening, things were absolutely perfect. Not too warm, not too cool, and only a slight breeze. Everyone had a good time, and there weren't any wedding crashers or anything like that (given that this was same weekend as the University of Arizona's graduation, this was actually a bit of a concern).

After the wedding, Journey and I were off on out honeymoon for two weeks. We started with a couple of days in Vancouver, BC (yes, yes, that is in Canada) before getting on a cruise ship and heading up the Inside Passage of Alaska. Journey and her family had done this a couple of years earlier for a family reunion. I wanted to go, but couldn't secure the time off until after the cruise was already all booked. This did NOT make either of us real happy. So, when it came time to plan out honeymoon, she really wanted to go on the cruise again so we could both do it. And that's what we did. We had a great time and saw a ton of cool shit and even had some time to relax, which after the previous few months, we really needed. The cruise ended in Anchorage, where we hand another couple days to just kind of relax and check out the town.

Since we got back, I've been spending most of my time either looking for jobs or preparing for qualifying exams. On the job front, I've had several interviews, even a couple where they've flown me out for a face-to-face. But I haven't been offered anything yet, and it's starting to piss me off. I know times are tough - I did decide to try to enter the job market right as the economy went to to shit, after all - but that still doesn't help much. I know I'll land something eventually, but in the meantime, it sucks.

And then there were my qualifying exams - "quals". These are the final exams of the PhD program before they let start working on your dissertation, taken after you've finished all of your course-work. For my program, the way they work is you are emailed a list of 6 questions. You then have exactly one week to write your responses to 4 of the questions and email them back. Each response is to be 10-12 pages in length, for a total of 40-50 pages. Basically, this is intended to test your ability to speak knowledgeably about your field based on the reading which you've done over the last few years. This is your opportunity to prove that you can pull everything you've learned together and show that you have a broader understanding of everything that going on in the field. This actually harder than you might think. It's entirely doable - you just have to carefully plan it all out and be able to access the information quickly and accurately. After you've finished the writing and emailed it back, you have to wait a couple days to see if you've passed. If you haven't passed one or more of the questions, you have a chance to retake the question, but if you fail again . . . well, let's just say you've effectively wasted a couple years of your life and money. Thankfully, I passed all four questions on the first try. This didn't mean I was done, however. Oh no, not quite. There is also an oral component to quals. You have to sit down in front of your evaluating committee and and talk about what you wrote. Basically, it's intended to make sure you can also present your knowledge when you're put on the spot. The questioning takes about 30-45 minutes, and then you have wait out in the hall while they discuss you.

The waiting sucks far beyond the questioning. Believe me.

I made it, though! So, now I get to start working on my dissertation (more or less - there are still a few hoops jump through, but they're not as bad as the quals).

You can see why I haven't exactly been around to blog in past few months. Like I said, little busy. But now that thing's are going to settle down a little, I hope be able to get back to writing on a more regular basis. And on that note - let the insanity resume!

I'm Alive But Not Really Back

I know it's been almost a month since my last post, and I apologize. But before anyone gets excited (yeah, right, like my posting or not really has that big an impact on your daily lives - it does right?), I'm not really back just yet, but I'll get to that in a minute.

First, why the long delay in posts. Simply put, I've been too damn busy in the last month. I was finishing up course work - not just for the semester, but forever! That's right, I am finally done with the course work for my PhD! Naturally, however, that meant that I've been incredibly busy during the day the last month or so. During that time, I've also been looking and applying for jobs. Now that my course work is done, it's time to get a real job. I've had some interesting leads, but nothing has panned out yet. It will, but job hunting is just a huge pain the ass. In addition to finishing course work and applying for jobs, I've been doing what I can to help with something of far greater importance - Journey's and my wedding! We're down the last few days (weddings on Saturday) and we've been scrambling to get the final details in place.

Which brings to why I'm not really back yet. As you might suspect, I'll be kind of busy the next few days with wedding stuff and then Journey and I are heading off on our honeymoon pretty much immediately (well, the next morning actually, but you understand). We're going on the Alaska cruise, with a few days in Vancouver and a few days in Anchorage on either end. Even if I were to have internet access, sorry folks but posting on here would be a very low priority!

So, hope things are well out there in the blogosphere, and I'll try to start posting more when we get back!

---

One more quick thing - I came across this earlier this morning and found too funny to not pass on!

A Sense of Entitlement

Holy fuck! I just spent half an hour trying to explain to someone that they are not special, and despite what they think, they are not entitled to anything. This person was talking about how they felt insulted that a college they had applied for a position at sent him a rejection letter by email. While I agree that a form letter is more courteous, he clearly felt that they should have sent an individualized, signed letter which outlined exactly why they hired the other person instead of him. He justified this by saying, "Well, this very small school in Nebraska where I was a very close second did this, so why shouldn't this much larger school do the same?"

The simple answer? Time and money.

When I tried to present this argument, he countered by saying that someone on the faculty should take their own time and money to do this. And his reasoning for this extra time, effort, and cost? Because "you should be respectful to other professionals." Yeah, you should. But you are asking a busy professional to do something outside of their normal responsibilities and at their own personal financial cost because you think it's "nice." Speaking as someone who doesn't exactly have a lot of time or money, my answer is more like "Yeah, right! Sorry, but I simply don't the time to do that." As far as I'm concerned, they don't owe you much beyond a "Thanks but not thanks" statement, even if it is by email. And this is coming from someone who has been applying for jobs for months now! (I'll write on that at some future point, but not right now!)

On to Round Two!

Final Series Score: Avalanche 4, Wild 2

Next Up: Detroit or Dallas

Who Knew?

Apparently, Mitt Romney has a sense of humor.

I didn't (and still don't) agree with a lot of his politics, but when I saw Mitt's "Top 10 Reasons for Dropping Out of the Race" I had to pass them on!

10. There weren't as many Osmonds as I thought.
9. I got tired of corkscrew landings under sniper fire.
8. As a lifelong hunter, I didn't want to miss the start of the varmint season.
7. There wasn’t room for two Christian leaders.
6. I was upset that no one had bothered to search my passport files.
5. I needed an excuse to get fat, grow a beard and win the Nobel prize.
4. I took a bad fall at a campaign rally and broke my hair.
3. I wanted to finally take off that dark suit and tie, and kick back in a light-colored suit and tie.
2. Once my wife Ann realized I couldn't win, my fundraising dried up.
1. There was a miscalculation in our theory: "As Utah goes, so goes the nation.”

Idiot Wind

Dylan was lucky when he wrote this song; he only had one idiot wind to deal with. Around campus right now, however, there are three of them.

Here's deal - apparently, one of the bus drivers for the free shuttle was playing a local radio station which was currently broadcasting a show by a rather outspoken and conservative host, who has been known to offend people in the past. A student complained to ASU, first back in October and then again last week. ASU decided the station had to be either turned down or turned off while they investigate the incident. The radio station, KTAR, cried foul, claiming ASU was trying to censor free speech, and they spent today broadcasting from campus.

If I may, I'd like to offer a little advice to all three parties (and quite frankly, even if you think I shouldn't, I'm going to anyway).

To the student who complained: Welcome to the real world. People are going to say, and you are going to hear, things you don't like and don't agree with. That's life. Deal with it. If you don't like it, ask the bus driver to turn it down. Don't go whining to the university. And quite honestly, even if you don't like or if you find it offensive, you might want to listen to anyway, because there will be others out there who do like it and if you've heard it yourself, you're better prepared to counter it. This is a university - you're supposed to confront ideas and opinions which are strange and uncomfortable to you.

To ASU: Quit hyperventilating. Just because one student complained, that doesn't mean there's some widespread problem. This is one person, all you had to do was tell then you would talk to the drivers and ask them to use some more common sense with their radio choices. There, problem solved.

To KTAR: Quit playing the righteous martyr. You know damn well that ASU asking their drivers to turn the station down while they look into this isn't "censoring free speech"! They aren't saying that it can't be played, simply that the drivers should use some discretion and common sense while ASU figures out what happened. I've actually listened to this particular host before, and I've found him offensive on many occasions. But he has every right to say what he wants to say - just as I have every right to turn it off!

Everyone involved has taken this whole thing and blown it way out of proportion. And knowing the other idiots in the area, I can almost guarantee that this will be all over the news for the next few day, which means I'll keep hearing about it. If you want to hear some more about this, here are a few of the things which have already come out.

ASU Student paper: Story #1
ASU Student paper: Story #2
AZ Central: Main stream media's take
KTAR: Their take on it

And just exercise my right of free speech, *ahem* You are all being fucking idiots! Knock it off, there are better things to be dealing with right now!

Now, I Find This Funny

Absolut Vodka ran an advertising campaign in Mexico, using this image. Needless to say, a bunch of people in the US got very upset. Personally, I just find it damn funny! Now, I can understand why some people are upset, but lets face it folks. Mexico got screwed in 1848. And a lot of people are still real sensitive about the whole thing. So, to have the Swedes of all people come out with an ad like this just makes me laugh!

Just Now Getting To My Coffee

I've been in the office more than an hour already - yes, I'm in my office by 7:00 AM - and I'm just now getting to my first cup of coffee. I've sent the last hour dealing with a bunch of financial stuff as part of one of my jobs. I got an email last yesterday saying that a bunch of receipts for purchases I made needed to be turned in. What the fuck?!? I make a very deliberate point to turn in purchase receipts within 24 hours. Always! (It's part of the little touch of OCD, and a bit of simple common sense!)

So, to find out that it appears my receipts weren't turned in is a problem. I had the fun of spending a while talking to the finance guy in the department (who is also in very early) and we got everything straighten out. Apparently, the statement he was given was for different credit card than he had been told, meaning that when he went to check the statement with the book for that card, it didn't match up. Now, since both cards belong to the same person (not The Overlord, but the other professor I work for at the same time), and since I usually place the orders on both, it's maybe not too surprising that this mistake was made. But it means that we had to spend a bit of time figuring all this out.

I've also spent a good deal of time this morning dealing with customer service on another order. I placed this order more than 2 weeks ago and hadn't heard anything. So I called them up and talked with one of their reps, who really was very helpful but far too perky. It seems that the order got "hung up" in their system and never processed. Well, that would explain why nothing has been delivered. I had to re-place the order, but this time I got her to enter in manually, which should help. Again, got it all squared away, but it took time. (The confirmation email just came through, which is a good sign.)

And I had to place yet another order, only to find out they no longer carry the product we wanted. Given that I was trying to order paper - yeah a little annoyed at that one. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find heavyweight (45 lb), matte finish paper? Surprisingly difficult. Glossy is easy because people use it in place of real photo-paper. They don't matte, so it's not stocked as much. We, on the other hand, need it print certificates of completion. For us, shiny is bad!

Okay, in the course of writing this, I've made it about 2/3 of the way through my first cup of coffee, and the world is a much better place. Back to work now.

Ranting At Random Annoyances

It feels like a while since I just went off on a good little rant. I've decided it's about time! And to that end, I've been making little notes to myself over the last few days on things which have been annoying me. Not major things; just the little stuff which bugs me.

Skater Fucks: Not all skaters by any means. Most of them make little to no impact on me simply because they're off doing their thing, and I'm doing mine. No, the ones I'm talking about are the ones who go cutting through crowds at a high rate of speed - these are the skater fucks. There are a number of these skater fucks on campus, which is not really a surprise. Now, theoretically, there's no skating or biking in the interior of campus, but no one really pays attention to that rule. Usually, it's not a big deal because most people are paying just enough attention to notice that there are other moving objects around them and avoid them. But when these skater fucks go flying by nearly clipping people, I often have to fight the urge to put out my arm and clothesline them just to see one of them go flying in a whole new way.

The Library Elevator: Just one of them - specifically, the middle one. For some reason, and apparently no one knows why, it always stops on the first floor (our library is weird - you actually have to go underground to get in, so the main level is actually referred to as "Circulation" while the ground level, which is one floor up, is still called the first floor). Anyway, the elevator always stops there, even if the button hasn't been pushed. And I know it's not just me - I've talked to other people about this and they've all noticed the same thing.

People Who Don't Understand What A "Turn Only" Lane Is: Yes, I know that the actual road continues for another block, but they have it striped (and signed) that way for a reason. And no, you are not important enough or special enough that you just get to just ignore those stripes and signs.

People Who Won't Move Over For A Fire Truck: Personally, I think the fire fighters should be allowed to either ram them out of the way, or show up at their house later and use the fire axes on the offender's car. Either way is fine by me.

People Who Think The Traffic Signal Doesn't Apply To Them: Admittedly, I've been known to cross against the light, but I always make sure I'm not going to hold up traffic or put anyone at risk. The people I'm talking about here are the drivers who speed through right after the light turns reds, or the pedestrians who just kind of wander out into the street and saunter across like they're the shit. They're close - they're A shit, not THE shit.

Allergies: It's that time of year when something around here blooms and I spend a couple weeks sniffling and sneezing and rubbing my eyes. Even with the allergy meds. A day or two is fine, but after more than a week, I get tired of this shit.

Changing My Network Password: Now this is actually a really important thing, and I know why it's done. I accept it. The problem is that, as is well established by now, I have some OCD tendencies. I get used to following a specific routine when doing things, especially in the office. So when my password changes, this throws things off for a couple weeks until entering the new password becomes the routine. This is definitely one of the smaller annoyances, but it still results in an "Aw fuck!" every time I enter the old password and the computer beeps at me.

I think that's about it for now. I'm sure there will be more things to annoy me later, but this is good for the moment.

---

Okay, one more thing. This isn't an annoyance, but I just saw this news story. And I just have to ask, who really thinks it's a good idea to use a fucking gun to install a satellite dish?!?

Random Quote

"Schadenfreude is chocolate for the soul. That's why ours are full of cavities."
~ Davan, from Something Positive, by R.K. Milholland

Arthur C. Clarke: 12/16/1917 - 03/19/2008

Perhaps most well known for his 2001: A Space Odyssey, science fiction author Arthur C. Clarke has died. He died Wednesday at his home in Colombo, Sri Lanka (for those of us in the US, that would have been Tuesday afternoon).

Arthur C. Clarke Quotes:
"Sometimes I think we're alone in the universe, and sometimes I think we're not. In either case the idea is quite staggering."

"They tell us absolutely nothing about intelligence elsewhere in the universe, but they do prove how rare it is on Earth." (Discussing UFOs)

"The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return. It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale."

"There is hopeful symbolism in the fact that flags do not wave in a vacuum."

"A hundred years ago, the electric telegraph made possible - indeed, inevitable - the United States of America. The communications satellite will make equally inevitable a United Nations of Earth; let us hope that the transition period will not be equally bloody."

"The inspirational value of the space program is probably of far greater importance to education than any input of dollars."

"It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value."

And finally, Clarke's Three Laws:

1. "When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong."

2. "The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible."

3. "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."

Blah . . .

I feel like crap this morning. I didn't feel too good yesterday either. The worst part is I can't tell if I'm just having really bad allergies right now, or if I'm coming down with something. I'm hoping for the first, but thinking it's the second. I don't really have time to be sick right now (okay, so I haven't really had time to be sick anytime in the last four years or so, but you know what I mean). And I can't afford to take the time to deal with sickness in my preferred fashion - namely, a pint of whiskey (yes, it comes in pints) all at once and being nearly unconscious for three days. It's the unconscious for three days that's the problem. As long as I'm conscious, I can still get work done, even if I don't feel great. Too much to do to be out that long. Fuck.

I Love Spring Break

And it's not because I'm going anywhere. In fact, one of the reasons I love Spring Break is precisely because I don't really go anywhere - but a lot of other people do! It means that despite the fact that I didn't coming into the office until 8:00, I wasn't fighting a bunch of (mostly undergrad) idiots for room on the road or spots in the parking lot. When you're school has nearly 65,000 students, over 50,000 of whom are undergrads, there are a lot of idiots to avoid on a daily basis. During Spring Break, however, a significant number of those students go out of town - especially the ones who get a big allowance from Mommy and Daddy. They head off to Mexico, or the Keys, or some other place where they can get drunk and try to hook up with someone they're probably never going to see again. "Spring Break and Alcohol: Working Together to Bring You New Idiot-Larva Every Year!"

Not really my scene. Never has been.

Thank you, I'm going to stay here, try to get some work done and maybe hang out with a small group of friends. I don't need (or want) to go drinking with hundreds of perfect strangers, most of whom think American Idol is the single greatest achievement of mankind ever and that a good person to model their lifestyle on is Britney Spears. These people (and I do use the term "people" loosely here) are hard enough for me to deal with when they're not drunk and are just going about their daily business (which mainly consists of trying to be more trendy than those around them - kind of like peacocks, only with cars, cell phones, and sun glasses instead of feathers). Put them someplace with little or no supervision or accountability, and then mix in lots of alcohol and sun? Oh. Hell. No. But if they want to do that, it's their right - I just want them to go somewhere else to do it. And conveniently enough, they oblige.

Maybe it's just that I'm in a good mood today; maybe that's why I'm not threatening to beat people with my cricket bat, although I'm quite sure I'll run into at least a few today who probably deserve it. I had a good weekend in Tucson with Journey. I got some extra sleep last night, and came into work a little later than normal this morning (that's how I celebrate Spring Break). And the weather was nice enough that I rolled down the windows on my way and turned up some Led Zeppelin. Unlike some other people I had the joy of experiencing back in January (1/14/08 post), when I impose my music on strangers, at least it's good music!

Whatever the reason, I find myself in a good mood on this, the first morning of Spring Break. So, my most heartfelt "Farewell" to all you Spring Break partiers! Go. Drink and romp to your hearts' content. Just make sure you "go" to do it!

Hockey Gets Some Respect

As most probably already know, I am a huge hockey fan. I often end up talking hockey with people trying to convince them of the greatness that is hockey. Too often, however, people kind of shrug and say "meh." Well, there is hope yet.

Recently, ESPN has been running a "Greatest Highlight of All Time" poll. They started with 100 highlights, eventually narrowing it down to 16, which were voted on by viewers. The final two were Boise State's "Statue of Liberty" play, and Mike Eurizone's goal against the USSR in the 1980 Olympics. Well, given my title to this post, you can probably figure out which one won out. This makes me happy!

Here's the link to ESPN's Greatest Highlight page.

Idiots Around The World

My dad send me a CNN.com story this morning. Apparently, two young men in Sydney, Australia, decided to rob a bar. Not the smartest thing in the world to begin with, but these two took it one step further. The bar they decided to rob was a biker hang-out. That's right - they walked right past all the motorcycles lined up out front, went inside, pulled knives and a machete, and started demanding money. Well, the bikers, who were in the other room, heard this and came in carrying their own weapons - chairs, tables, and pretty much anything else that wasn't nailed down. One of the robbers jumped through a plate-glass window in an attempt to escape (he was caught by police a short time later). The other tried to run out the back door and was tackled by some of the bikers, tied up with electrical cord, and left for the police.

I mean, really, how dumb do you have to be to try and rob a biker-bar? As my dad put it, not quite Darwin Award caliber, but it comes pretty close!

First Forsberg, Now Foote

I just received a call from Propsqueen, informing me that the Avs have also once again picked up Adam Foote. Here's the story! Suddenly, the Avs are looking a lot like they did back in 2000-2001, when we last won the Stanley Cup. Things are getting very interesting as we approach the trade deadline today (which, I believe, is at 3:00 PM EST).

Again, picture is the from the Avalanche website.

News To Me

I just received an email from my father, informing me that apparently the Colorado Avalanche and Peter Forsberg have reached an agreement and he will return to the team! The last I had heard, Forsberg had decided not to return to the NHL this season. Guess he changed his mind! And if you don't believe me, here's the link. And in case there was any doubt, I an thrilled to hear this. Forsberg, despite the injuries he's had, is still one of the all time greats. And with the spate of injuries the Avs have had this year, we need all the help we can get!
(I got this image from the Avalanche website.)

Awesome!

I just got word that one of my classes for tomorrow has been cancelled! Now, I don't want to rejoice at the fact that the professor has come down with the flu - I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But the unexpected free time is a definite bonus!

Idiots Who Don't Know What They're Doing Need To Stop Fucking With My Shit

A command has been passed down from on-high, by someone who doesn't know what they're doing, which (potentially) will cause a proverbial shit-storm. I can't actually talk about it right now, because I'm not actually supposed to know just yet and the decision has not been finalized. But I can say that if it happens the way I've heard it will, there will be many many angry people (me being one of them at this moment) and all kinds of bad will happen.

I. Am. NOT. Happy.

---

On a side note, I know there have been several times lately when I've started to talk about something only to back off and say "Sorry, can't talk about it. Hush hush and all that." I do apologize for that. I would far rather just come out and say what's going on, and really rant. The problem, as many of you will understand, is that anything I say on here is public - anyone could, and can, read it. The reality of the world we live in today is that you have to be very careful what you write. This isn't like a private, hand-written journal which no one else is ever going to see. This is open to the world. And in the interest of not starting a shit-storm of my own, there are simply occasions when I can't talk about things. Just know that when say something like that, it's because I really can't, but feel the need to rant some anyway.

Email Hell

Email takes up more of my time in the day than it should. I just spent my first hour and a half replying to critical emails - not all my emails, just the most critical.

Of course, it really doesn't help that I have three accounts I need to keep track of: a personal, a work, and a professional. There's actually a fourth, but that's just a junk account for when I need an email to sign up for something - it just needs emptying once a week or so.

Maybe I could acquire a minion of my own, just to reply to emails.

Hmmmm

There is a certain level of amusing irony to have "Sweet Home Alabama" come on, and to be turning the volume down right as it's telling you to turn it up. Yes, that's the kind of state my mind is in right now. No idea why, either.

I'm guessing it has something to do with a rather long, but pretty productive city committee meeting last night, which was followed by an informal "meeting" of a couple of us committee members over beer. While I won't talk about the particulars just yet, let's just say that if we get our way and carry out a general plan we discussed last night, things are going to rather dramatically change for our committee and for our place in the city government.

The planning of coups over beer is fun!

*Twitch Twitch*

I really hate it when I get harassed about incorrect information on something when that incorrect information is due to someone else not really doing their job. Then it's demanded that I get things corrected and back out right away. Why do you think I sent the information request to you last week?

People Can Really Suck

I've actually waited a couple days to post this simply because I wanted to have some time to reflect on things before I wrote anything. I think I can do that now.

So, Friday night, I ended up going down to my usual bar in Chandler to hang out and hear the band (who were actually pretty good, although I never did catch their name). Turns out, there were a bunch of people I know from the bar there that night and we got to hanging out and having a good time. I took off my glasses and set them on the bar right next to my beer. I do this on occasion - and not just when I'm drinking, but when I'm hanging out and don't have to actually focus my eyes on anything more than about five feet away. My eyes aren't so bad that I need my glasses for close conversation, so this just happens sometimes.

Anyway, my friends decide to go outside for a smoke break. With plans on joining them in a minute (for the outside bit, not the smoking), I head off to recycle some of the beer, leaving my pint and glasses on the bar. When I came back, however, they were gone! Both my beer and my glasses! Now, I'm pretty well known around this bar (this is the place I've been going to watch football on Sundays for last three years), and I've actually done this on a number of occasions with no problem. This time, however . . .

I immediately checked with the bar tenders, the bouncer by the door, and some of the people sitting in the immediate area. None of them saw anything - which doesn't actually surprise me. It's a Friday night, things are a bit busy, and really, how often do you pay attention to other people's things on the bar? I checked with my friends outside as one of them in particular has a reputation for pulling little pranks on people. Things like taking someone's pack of cigarettes while they're away and turning all of them around in the pack and then setting it back, or stealthily pocketing someone's lighter and then passing it off to someone else for "safe keeping" - and I admit that I have taken part in some of these jokes on past occasions. But Tim was innocent and equally concerned. And as he pointed out, if he had taken my glasses, I would have found them sitting on top of his head. That's the kind of prank he would pull.

I can understand someone taking my beer. While thoroughly annoying, it makes sense. But taking my glasses? That's just asshole-ish.

So I checked around with everyone who might know something, but to no avail. My glasses were just gone. I left my number with the bar tender, Sarah, in case they turned up, but not expecting much. I made it home alright, although I made damn sure to take some time at the bar drinking water before heading out to just help avoid any potential problems. And I'm proud to say that I kept my anger in check until after I was home - driving without my glasses was bad enough, but driving without my glasses and in a blinding rage would not have been good.

Luckily, I still had my previous glasses at home. Unfortunately, the prescription on those is probably three to four years old. They were fine for driving to the glasses place to get an eye exam and a new pair, but that's about it. And that's how I spent most of my Saturday morning - getting new glasses. And in all honestly, it had been about a year and a half since my last eye exam, so I was past due. But that wasn't really what I wanted to spend my Saturday morning doing. And since my old ones are so out of date, I kind of had to go to one of the "1 Hour" places, which are always more expensive. But I couldn't really function without new glasses, so I sucked it up and shelled out for 'em.

I related all this to Journey Saturday afternoon. I think I may have concerned her a bit. At one point she said, quite correctly, that whoever did this was not worth my time and energy. And she's right. I seriously doubt that this was intended to be a malicious attack on me or anything like that. It was simply a bar-room prank, probably fueled by a good amount of alcohol. So, I'll try to be cool and calm about it (hence, the waiting a few days to post). Should the bar ever figure out who it was, however, then they may be worth my time and energy. Not in the "cricket bat to the knee" sense (although that will undoubtedly cross my mind), but I would probably try to recoup some of the cost of replacing my glasses out of them. Not all - as I said, it was kind of past due anyway. But maybe the difference in cost between the one hour place and what I would have paid at some place that takes a week to get them done. I kind of doubt that day will ever come, however, so I won't worry about until/unless it comes up.

Hey! It's ASU!

You really might just see something like this around ASU in particular, and the Phoenix Valley in general. At some point (likely when I've been out drinking with friends) I might just have to respond in a similar fashion.

Excellent*

*Said in a creepy Mr. Burns voice.

I just finished a meeting with my advisor. I've been struggling with how I'm going to write my dissertation, and what my topic is going to be. I originally had one plan, but was going to scrap it in favor of expanding my Master's thesis in an attempt to just get the damn thing done. She advised against that on the basis that, given what I would need to do, I wasn't going to save any time. So, I went back to my original idea, which is much more in my professional field. The problem was back to how I was going to think about it and how I was going to structure it.

Well, last week, I had an epiphany one morning in the shower, before I was fully awake. It was in that nice little window of time when thoughts are just free-form in your head, but you're not to the point of really thinking about them yet, if that makes sense. This was one of those moments where the light-bulb goes on, but this time it was a big enough light-bulb that, had this been a literal occurrence, I would probably be dead from the amount of power flowing through the damn thing. Anyway, everything suddenly clicked - and I was completely awake. I ran my idea through my mind again, now that I was really functioning, and became convinced that it would in fact work. And it would actually be far easier than I originally thought it might be (this is a vast and great thing!).

Today was the first chance I had had to actually sit down with my advisor and go through the whole thing to see if she thought it would work - and more importantly, be acceptable to my committee. The answer was "Yes." There is still a lot work to be done to actually do the whole thing, but now that there's a structure and direction to it, things are far happier in my world.

Before anyone asks, however, no - I'm not going to tell everyone what my plan is. Academia is highly competitive, and ideas are usually jealously guarded for fear of someone stealing it. Don't believe me? Start with this PhD comic and the rest of the story arc (about 10 of them) - Jorge Cham knows what he's talking about! Now it's not that I distrust anyone who might actually read my blog on any kind of regular basis - it's that anything which goes on the internet lives forever, and can spread. I'm sure all of my readers are fine and could be trusted - with the possible exception of Propsqueen . . . But I don't know who else is down the line. With a few exceptions, you'll find out when I finish and defend the thing!

Distractions and Amusements

I received an email from one of my friends last night condemning me for having introduced them to Anywhere But Here. She is now apparently addicted to it. My response, of course, was to laugh and send her a link to another comic I find greatly amusing. This got me thinking - specifically about how much you can tell about a person based on what they find amusing or entertaining. So, to give you a picture into my slightly twisted mind, here's a list of some of my current five favorite web-comics.

Anywhere But Here - The story of a jazz-playing, chain-smoking bastard who is stuck in North Dakota for school. He deals with this by physically and physiologically abusing the people around him. It has a very dark sense of humor, so I naturally enjoy it quite a bit!

Sequential Art - Focuses on a group of roommates: Art, the artist; Kat, the cat-girl photographer; Pip, the British, porn-addicted penguin; and Scarlet, the hyper-active, possibly genius squirrel with a noted lack of concentration. The comic's navigation is a bit of a pain, but it has a great sense of humor, which has been known to cause people to laugh until they can't breath.

Least I Could Do - A bunch of mid-20s friends, each with a unique personality. Lots of jokes about sex, movies, drinking, family, and llamas. No I won't explain the llamas - you'll have to find that out for yourselves. The current story-arc is a flash back.

Something Positive - One that has been around for a long time, and is still going strong. R.K. Milholland has an incredibly twisted sense of humor, but can do serious with the best of them. Plus, there's a cat without fur or bones which can consume nearly anything.

Sinfest - Another one which has been around a while without losing its touch. The very first strip shows the main character, Slick (think Calvin with a tie and sun-glasses), walking up to a booth with the Devil sitting behind it. The sign above the booth reads "Anything You Want: Your Soul". After a moment of thought, Slick sits down and says "What the Hell". You get the idea.

Today's Annoyance

It appears the already crap-tastic sound card in my office computer is starting to fritz out. I've been losing sound on the right intermittently all morning. I know it's not the speakers because I've already tried changing them out with another set. This means it's the card. I'm enough of an audiophile that putting up with sound from only one side is not an option. Even if the speakers are only about 18 inches apart, I can hear the difference. I'll have to talk the boss into letting me replace it. I don't really want to deal with the people at Dell because they'll just send me the same card again. I'd rather spend a bit of money and get a decent one which won't have this same problem again in a year.

I did spend a bit of money for a new keyboard recently. This is my money simply because I know at some point I'm going to want to replace my desktop at home (my current one, which I basically don't use anymore, is about eight and half years old), and I decided I'd want a good keyboard for that anyway, so it makes sense to buy this myself and just take it with me when I leave. I decided it was time for a new one because I sometimes get some pain in my right wrist. I know it's a combination of spending so much time at the computer and playing bass some evenings. Journey recommended that I think about getting an ergonomic keyboard to spare my wrist undue aggravation. So, I did some looking and found a wireless one for pretty cheap - I like the idea of being able to literally put my feet up at work and still be able to get things done. That's suppose to show up sometime today. Hopefully that will distract me from the damn sound card for a bit!

I Hate Clip Art

I was just send a group of file to be put together into a PDF - a fairly regular occurrence given I have Adobe Pro and can actually do that quickly and easily. This group, however, includes a bunch of fuckin' cheap, low-quality clip art as their images. You want a picture of the White House on your file? Fine - use a good one. It's not like they're hard to find! And there are far, far better images to use for a section on Pearl Harbor than a fucking generic anchor clip! Hell, part of what I'm paid to do is help with designing and putting together things like this. All they had to do was drop me an email with the pages and say, "hey, could you track down some good images for each topic?" I would have been happy to - and I could have done with far better results in almost no time!

Oh, well. They didn't ask, and I'm sure as hell not going to take the time or effort to do it now. But, really! Just because you're a public school teacher does NOT mean you HAVE to use clip art!

Giant Upset

Okay - yes I know that all kinds of people are using this pun to describe last night's Super Bowl, but I'm still a little tired this morning and don't feel like trying to be real creative right at this morning. I must say, however, that I am quite pleased with the outcome of the game. As I said the other day, I'm just not a big fan of the Patriots. I'm not a fan of the Giants, either, but I don't actively dislike them so I was happy to see them win. And while this wasn't my favorite Super Bowl (that would be the Broncos/Packers game in '98), at least the 4th Quarter was exciting!

Super (-Hyped) Bowl

Now I will readily admit that I am a big football fan. I love hanging out with the folks at my favorite bar, drinking beer, bull-shitting, and watching football on Sundays. For my money, this is a great way to relax for a few hours.

That being said, however, I am really ready for the Super Bowl to be over and done with already. While most football fans have been thinking about/dealing with the Super Bowl for the last month or so, those of us in the Phoenix area have been dealing with it for over a year now! As you probably know, the big game is here this year.

Anyway, now that we're down to the last few days before the game we have the added fun of all the fans and celebs descending on the Valley to see and to be seen. As I have mentioned before, Phoenix traffic is bad enough to begin with, but with the addition of thousands of out-of-towners who are here specifically to party . . . well, let's just say that my normal low level of tolerance for idiots has been worn away completely. I swear, if it weren't for that whole "getting arrested" thing, I would seriously consider going up to Scottsdale (where most of the celebs and trendies are) and just start cracking people's knee-caps with my cricket bat. Not enough to kill them, but certainly enough to make them want to get the hell out of town. Unfortunately, I want to hang out with friends and watch the game - hence you see my problem. The cracking of knee-caps would make me oh so happy, but would almost certainly result in my missing the game because of said incarceration. Not to mention the fact that Journey would be none too happy with me.

So, I guess I'll just have to put up with these wastes of oxygen for a few more days. I mean, what else can I really (and legally) do?

On top of the idiots, there's also the fact that I'm just not that interested in either teams this year. I don't like the Patriots, and I don't care about the Giants. Yes, I know the Pats are going for the unbeaten season record, but they also seem so damn arrogant that I just can't get behind them. That, and the fact that a good number of their "fair-weather" fans are assholes certainly doesn't help. As for the Giants, well . . . actually I've already said it: I simply don't care about them. Near total indifference. Who knows, maybe I'll get into the game more as I'm hanging with friends, but for now my general statement on this match up is "meh". My guess is we'll have pretty close to a repeat of the Pats/Giants game which closed out the regular season. I would like the Giants to win just to spite the Pats and those bandwagon fans, but I'm predicting that the Pats will come away with the win. Final score: Pats 35, Giants 31.

The Purgatory Line

This ain't exactly hell.
It sure as hell ain't heaven.
I love you like the dickens and I miss you like the Devil.
I guess I'll do my time waitin' in this purgatory line.
Angels here are wearin' fancy new perfume,
and all the bread's unleavened.
Well I guess it'll have to do till I find you.
I don't know what I'm doin' here or why
I'm waitin' in this purgatory line.

I ain't exactly up.
I ain't gone too far down.
I'm lookin' for some answers and there ain't no one around.
I guess I'll lose my mind waitin' in this purgatory line.
If Jesus walked on water then where'd he get them shoes?
It just keeps gettin' harder to lose these walkin' blues.
I want you to come and take me home for a while.
Save me from this purgatory line.

Sometimes I can laugh.
Other times I cry.
It ain't exactly funny. My feet are both on fire.
I guess they'll just burn for a while waitin' in this purgatory line.
Lovin' you is so easy, but waitin' here just ain't.
I know I can be patient, but please don't hesitate to cross my mind.
That's all I've got for a while.
Waitin' in this purgatory line.

~ "The Purgatory Line," Drive-By Truckers, Brighter Than Creation's Dark

I hate the work-week - it means I'm not with Journey. Waiting for May to come sucks more every day.

Music Reviews

I have become increasingly annoyed with Rolling Stone's website and their music reviews. They seem to have fallen into that trap of believing that they know more about music than everyone else. Admittedly, they know a lot, but sometimes lately they seem to be dismissing a lot of fringe/alt music as not worth listening to because it's fringe or alt. Now, if you want to say that an album isn't popular because it's fringe, that's one thing. But so say that the music is bad because it's not mainstream is just stupid. Sadly, this seems to be what RS has been doing with increasingly regularity recently.

Because of this, I went in search of a new source of music reviews. I came across Metacritic.com, which has actually been around for nearly 10 years. How I've never heard about it before is beyond me, but there it is. Anyway, one of the things I like the most about Metacritic is the fact that it's actually a compiler site. They collect reviews from a bunch of different places and put them together in a single place. This, of course, includes RS, but they also pull reviews from Billboard, The Onion, Village Voice, and many others. From these collected reviews, they give a "critics score" (from 0 to 100). Best of all, they actually explain how they go about calculating this "metascore" so you can be informed about their reasoning/logic. And of course they open things up to public review as well. This is a little more simplistic (or, rather, standard) as the "user" score is a strict average of user assigned scores (0-10).

So far I've only checked out Metacritic's music section, but they also have reviews for films, DVDs, television, books, and games. So if you're looking for reviews on something, think about checking them out. At the very least, it'll give you a quick glance at what people are saying!

Might Explain A Few Things About Vista

Am I the only one who thinks Bill looks stoned off his ass?

Losing My Mind

It's official - I'm either losing my mind or there are gremlins hiding in my office. This morning I went to look for a book I had ordered a couple months back and couldn't find it! I know I ordered it - I have the receipt and confirmation email. And this is a supplier I've used many times before, so I know they are reliable. And I'm pretty sure I remember it arriving and getting put on my bookshelf. But it sure as hell ain't there now! I know I didn't loan it out to someone - I have made a habit of keeping a list of who in the department I have loaned books to in case I need to get one back for some reason.

So, this leaves me with two basic conclusions: my mind is going or gremlins.

Luckily I don't need for a few weeks yet, but as I have some open, unscheduled time this morning I was planning on getting some it read ahead of time. Guess fuckin' not!

Interesting Video

I got emailed this video earlier today. While I'm not going to personally take a side on the "author's" argument at this time, I did think the video was worth passing on if you haven't seen it before. I'm abstaining for the time being simply because I just now watched it and want to take some time to think it over before I make any kind of real judgement on it. But give it a look and see what you think. Prior warning, it's a little long at almost 10 minutes - so be prepared.

SUV Idiot

Why do some SUV owners drive like the thing is made of crystal and will break with the slightest bump or jostle? Isn't part of the point of buying a SUV to have a vehicle which can withstand some punishment without any real problem? You know, be able to protect you? Maybe I'm just missing something here.

This morning I got caught behind one of these particular SUV owners. For whatever reason, they decided they had to creep over a speed bump. While severely annoying, I guess I can let this go. Maybe they had a full cup of coffee or a sleeping child in the SUV and didn't want to upset things. But when they did the same thing with a slight bump in the road at the next intersection - and when I slight, I'm talking a "bump" of less than an inch in height - I began to suspect that they were just an idiot! I have seen people in wheelchairs take on this particular little challenge with more aggression than the idiot in front of me! I've also seen those same people in wheelchairs get through the intersection faster than this jackass.

Once they were finally through the intersection, however, they had absolutely no problem driving aggressively. Weaving in and out of traffic, speeding, failing to come a complete (or even an incomplete) stop before making a right turn at a red light. These were no problem whatsoever. A speed bump and an empty intersection with another little bump? These apparently took as much effort and skill as climbing Mt. Everest - ass naked and blindfolded!

And I was so hoping to start today in a mood other than "severely annoyed" - guess not.

Where's My Cricket Bat?

Okay - so I actually do know where it is: in the mail. I finally found a good one at a reasonable price online and am now just waiting for it show up. But that's beside the point.

I was really wishing I had this morning at about 2:00 AM. That's when a bunch of girls (undergrads, and likely drunk ones at that, by the sound of them) pulled up outside one of the buildings in my apartment complex, all jumped out of the car, laughing and shouting at each other, leaving their music on at a fairly impressive level. What the fuck?!? Why are you out until 2:00-fuckin'-AM on a Sunday? And what makes you think that I'm interested in listening to your music at that time of "day" (not that I would ever listen to the kind of music they were playing!).

This went on for about 10 minutes or so, which doesn't sound like a long time, but when you sleep as little as I do to begin with, every minute counts, damnit. I was actually getting ready to either shout something out the window or call the police's noise complaint number when they finally finished whatever kind of prolonged (and loud) good-bye ceremony drunk undergrad girls participate in and things quited down.

The end result of all this is that I had a much harder time getting up at my usual 5:00 AM than I normally do, and have spent much of the day being slightly agrevated by the whole thing. Ah, if only I could have legally gotten away with smashing in their head-lights with my soon-to-arrive cricket bat, the world would be a much better place - for me at least!

Waiting for the Coffee to Kick In

This is me this morning. As much as I love my coffee, I very rarely actually need it to wake up in the morning. Today is one of those times.

Really Fuckin' Annoyed

I just discovered that the Colorado/Anaheim hockey game is apparently on the "NHL Network," whatever the fuck that is. I paid good money for Center Ice, and now they're telling me that I can't get my games? WHAT THE FUCK?!?

Crazy Magnet Pt. 2

I have further proof of my last post!

I stopped by Safeway on my way home this evening to pick up a few things. As I was finishing up and getting ready to head for check out, I heard someone yelling and cursing. I headed towards the sound to check out what was going on. Turns out, a couple of store employees were physically restraining a guy on the floor. He was cursing them out and threatening to sue the store. I'm not exactly clear on why they had him on the ground, but there was a cart right there that one of the store managers quickly spirited away. This went on for at least 15 minutes while I was there, and was still going on after I had checked out and left the store. It's my assumption that they were waiting for the police.

Okay, so unlike the rest of my examples, this didn't happen directly to me, but I believe my point still stands. I mean, really, what were the chances of that occurring at the exact time that I just happened to be there?

Crazy Magnet

For some reason, in the last few weeks I have become a magnet for crazy. Naturally, not everyone and everything around me is crazy. But it does seem like the number of crazy people I encounter on a regular basis has increased recently. Now, I don't mean people talking to their shoes kind of crazy. More the walk away and think "wow - there's a nut job for you" kind of crazy.

First, there was the guy who was trying to convince me and one of my friends that the "immaculate conception" was really the product of space aliens. And he was sure that, since I am a pagan, I believed the same. We just smiled and nodded.

Then there were the two drunk girls a couple weekends ago. One of them stumbled up the table my friends and I were at, proceeded to try and bet us that she weighed more than I do. I am not exactly a small person, so we knew she was drunk/crazy. She wandered off, and we just kind of laughed and went back to watching college football. As we were leaving the bar, however, we encountered the two of them again. This time, they were having problems with their car. As in they had managed to lock themselves inside and couldn't get out. Yes, that's right, INSIDE! One of them (the one who had tried to bet us earlier) had made it out through an open sun-roof. The other was terribly upset because her "boobs were too big to fit through!" (Her words, not mine.) And on top of it all, she couldn't get the keys out of the ignition and couldn't get the car to start. One of my friends climbed in through the open roof, got the keys out of the ignition with no problem, and handed them out to me. I opened the door, letting the other girl out - who promptly ran inside, moaning about how badly she had to pee. I tried starting the car - and had no trouble whatsoever. We told them to go back inside, and get a cup of coffee to warm up (and hopefully sober up, too). Yeah, crazy.

Next, there was the couple who switched back and forth between talking to me about football and beer, and having a loud, rather heated argument about plane tickets from Phoenix to Las Vegas. The argument ended when he said "this relationship is over" and she stormed out. After he paid and left, all of us in the near vicinity looked at each other and quickly agreed that that was rather uncomfortable.

And most recently, was the guy who tried to tell me that he could determine my entire personality based on the beer bottle I had in front of me. While this might have actually been really interesting and amusing, he never actually got around to telling me what kind of personality I have. I also decided not to tell him that the bottle in front of me wasn't mine, but one that someone had left just prior to my sitting down. For the record, it was a Bud Lite bottle. Anyone who knows me will tell you I DON'T drink Bud-fuckin'-Lite. Or any other mass produced American pilsner for that matter. Bud, Coors, Michelob, etc, not my taste.

For some reason, people like to approach me and want to talk. I'm accustomed to this. I don't particularly give off a threatening vibe or anything, so random people will talk to me. That, and the fact that I tend to make eye contact with people. It's my way of acknowledging another human being. So I make eye contact and people feel free to talk to me. But recently, a lot of those random people have been down right crazy. It's like I'm wearing a sign which says, "Hey, please dump all your crazy right here!"

Unusual Weather

Well, in addition to it finally being winter - or at least what passes for winter in this part of Arizona - we had heavy heavy fog this morning. We're not talking a little fog either. This was thick enough that, at times, driving visibility was below 1000 feet. And since it was still dark, that made the drive into work kind of fun! At least most of the drivers out had enough sense to take it a little slower - this is actually a bit of a shock given the usual behavior of Arizona drivers in bad weather.

I haven't seen fog like this sense I was in Wales, where the whole area is often in the middle of a cloud. You get used to it when it's always foggy, but it's been long enough for me that this morning was actually pretty cool! This was the kind of fog that is so thick, it almost appears as a solid wall when you approach it. For example, the parking lot was shrouded in fog, while my building wasn't. I took a minute to look back when I got to my floor's landing, and I could see where it was nice and clear and where the buildings suddenly disappeared in gray. It was almost like something out of an old bad horror flick!

Well That Was Stupid of Me

As I said a few days ago, I was hoping to be able to get a little more sleep now that my coursework is done for the semester. This morning, I tried to make that happen.

I should have gotten up at my usual time.

I really was pretty stupid to think that the Universe would let me sleep in without some kind of reprisal. I had failed to take into account that today is the first day of finals. And since there are finals which begin at 7:30, there are far more whiney little undergrads running around this morning than usual.

And, of course, I had decided to sleep in only about half an hour - which meant that I came into campus at about 7:20. Just in time to have deal with these undergrads. I think being dragged over carpet tacks and dipped in rubbing alcohol would have been more fun.

But, at least now I'm safely in my office, with some Irish-punk playing, and my coffee in hand!

Unexpected Development

So, I have mentioned problems with my roommates before. As of sometime yesterday, I don't have to worry about it any more.

They moved out.

They were there when I left for work yesterday morning, but when I got home they were gone. Poof! All they left behind were a pumpkin they bought right before Halloween, their keys, the gate remote, and an empty Sunny-D jug (in the fridge, for crying out loud!). Oh, and a water glass sitting in front of my bedroom door. Even I'll admit that was a nice little parting statement.

Luckily, they had already given me a check which covers last month's utilities and about 2 weeks of December's rent, so I'm not fucked for rent this month. The fact that the check was left for me Monday morning and they were gone by Tuesday evening makes me think they had planned this out a bit.

And while the timing is not great, it could be worse. At least I'm done with classes for the semester, and I know that there are usually people looking for a new place to live around the first of the year. Granted, it would have been nice to know that they were planning on leaving. Ah well.

If it seems a little strange that I'm not going off in my usual fashion on this, it's because I had pretty much come to the conclusion that it was time to get rid of them. Nothing personal, exactly; it just wasn't working out for any of us. The final impetus came, ironically enough, with the rent check left on Monday. I didn't see my roommates Sunday, so I left a note on their bedroom door Sunday night, stating what the rent was for this month, and asking that they just leave a check on the table for me to pick up Monday morning. Left with their check was a note saying sorry, but they didn't have enough money in their checking account to cover the full amount and that they would leave another check for Tuesday morning with the balance. My thought was, "Well that's a pain. Haven't you guys learned yet that rent will be due start of the month? And you should know by now roughly how much it will be. Try planning ahead." But I didn't make a big deal out of this simply because I had other things more deserving of my attention at the start of this week. Well, yesterday morning I got up and looked for a check on my way out the door. There wasn't one, but since I knew I wasn't going to make to bank yesterday before they closed, I decided not to worry about too much.

I related the first part of the this check saga to Journey over the phone Monday night, and she said "I think it's really time you got rid of these guys." She was right, and by the time I got up Tuesday morning, I had decided to give them notice that it really wasn't working and that I was going to ask them to be out by first of the year. I figured I could give them until the end of the month, especially given that at that point I was assuming they were going to pay for December. But, they beat me to it.

So, if I'm not fuming about it, heaping curses upon them, or dropping the F-Bomb, it's because the decision had already been made. I was (and still am) a little annoyed that I had to scramble a bit last night to get roommate-wanted ads posted, but that I can live with. Hopefully I can get some good applicants this time around!

(Needless to say, this was NOT what I had in mind when I posted yesterday afternoon, but it does fit the bill I guess!)

I Think I Can Start Sleeping Again

Well, as of about 30 seconds ago, I have turned in my last paper for the semester. This means I no longer will feel the need to be in quite so early every day. There's still work for me to do for The Overlord, but with my classwork done for the semester, I relax a bit.

I really must admit, I'm looking forward to sleeping more than 5 hours a night during the week. And with any luck, I'll be able to go back to getting some real positing done on a regular basis! I even have a couple of things in mind for later this week or the start of next week.

Den of Coffee Bean Hell

Well, it's been a while, but there is finally a new Foamy which I really enjoyed.

Check it out.

And remember, you're only paranoid if they're not out to get you!

Where Did It Go?

What the hell happened to the last year?!? I was reminded today that Repeal Day (Dec. 5th) is coming up soon. As first, my thought was "That can't be right! Wasn't Repeal Day was just a couple months ago? I posted about it!" But then I went back and looked, and sure enough, that post was from almost a year ago. Somehow, with all the crazy shit going on in my life (and don't get me wrong, much of that is the good kind of crazy shit), this last year has just flown by. It's a little hard to believe that we're already at the end of November. Somehow, part of my mind is certain that it's really still early October. (Check out this PhD Comic - yeah, I'm the guy in the third panel right now!)

Well, That's A New One

I currently serve as the moderator for a graduate student listserv for our department. It doens't really mean much work, but it does mean that I get requests for approval on what are clearly spam messages. Since I don't really have to do anything with them but delete the request, I don't think about them too much. Occasionally, however, something interesting comes through. Each approval request includes the subject line from the message. I just had this one come through:

"Vampire Computer Clown Triangle Crystal Family Family"

This is probably the most bizarre one I've ever had. I only wish I knew what the hell it means!

Bizarre

Know what this is? Yes, I know it's a fence! But look closer, know what the fence it made of?

These are old, surplus medical stretchers from WWI. They have been turned on their sides and used to make this fence around a public housing development in England. I came across a reference to this kind of thing is something I was reading a month or two ago. It was such a bizarre notion that I went in search of some images online, but couldn't find any. So I did some follow up research and ended up emailing the British National Trust (kind of like the US National Park Service). After my request for information got bounced around a bit, I got a reply from someone in London, who said that the specific development I had referred to in my email was gone, but that it had been a common practice. In fact, the Tube line one of his friends takes home goes right along one of these housing developments. He'll ask his friend to stop by and take some pictures and then he'll email them to me.

The next day, I had an email with a stack of pictures. The one above is one of the better ones. This is a closer shot, showing the "leg" of the stretcher.

You Probably Could've Planned That Better

I came across an interesting sounding job today (in Denver, so that might be kind of cool). The application instructions just wanted you to send in a cover letter and resume by email to the HR director at a specific address they provided. So I did.

And I got an auto reply back saying "I will be out of the office until Nov. 16." Now, this job posted today, the 14th. My thinking is, if you're going to be out of the office until the 16th, why don't you just wait and post the job on the 16th? You know, when you actually be in the office? Or if you don't want to have the job be posted on a Friday, wait for Monday.

But maybe that's just me.

---

UPDATE: 11/15, 10:15 AM

Well, I now have an answer - or, at least the question no longer really matters. As it turns out, they have someone else covering the incoming applications while the HR director is out of the office. I heard back from them today, saying they wanted to fill out one of those Affirmative Action survey forms and mail it back to them. Fine, I'll tell them I'm a white/Native Hawai'ian, non-disabled male who is not a military vet. At least I can use one of the department pre-paid envelopes to send it back - the department actually encourages grad students applying for jobs to use these as it's faster, cheaper, and helps with the department's placement rate. Fine by me!

I Wonder What It Means

"Never could read no road map
And I don't know what the weather might do,
But hear that witch wind whinin'
0h, see that Dog Star's shinin',
I've got a feelin' there's no time to lose,
No time to lose!"
~Grateful Dead, "Saint of Circumstance"

I've been listening to the Dead most of today at work. But for some reason, this particular verse caught my attention and I haven't been able to get it out of my head since. I'm sure there's a reason for this, but I have no idea what that could be.

You Must Believe

Before going any further, I will freely admit I'm a little left in my politics. I see the Republican Party as more than a little creepy and weird, favoring the pursuit for money and power over all else. I do not, however, hold any specific feelings for the Democratic Party. The Democratic Party has more than itself of nut-jobs and crazies hypocrites who specialize in running around like chickens with their heads cut off (most of Boulder, CO, for example). And I want to stress here that I am talking about the Parties, not specific people belonging to those parties!

All that being said, however, I found this most amusing this morning. I have lifted it from Propsqueen, who I'm sure won't mind me reposting it here (after all, she got it from someone else, plus if she has a problem she'll simply let me know by giving me a smack upside the head next time I see her!).

So, without further ado . . .

To Be A Republic Today You Need To Believe:

1. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

2. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's Daddy made war on him , a good guy when Cheney did business with him, and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

3. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is Communist, but trade with China and Viet Nam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

4. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multinational drug corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

6. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches, while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

7. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

8. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our longtime allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

9. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy, but providing health care to all Americans is socialism. HMO's and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

10. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

11. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense, but a president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

12. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

13. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

14. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

15. Supporting "Executive Privilege" for every Republican ever born, who will be born or who might be born (in perpetuity.)

16. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

17. Support for hunters who shoot their friends and blame them for wearing orange vests similar to those worn by the quail.

And, yes, there are any number of posts out there which do the same thing to Democrats, but this was more amusing to me!

Obliviousness

You may have heard or seen that there was a fire at the ASU student union yesterday. It was a 2-alarm fire, which broke out around 12:45PM and forced the fire department to evacuate the whole building - about 5,000 people. The Union is going to be closed for at least today, and likely most of the weekend at the very least, but luckily no one was hurt.

Why did I title this "Obliviousness" if I'm talking about a fire that was all over the news, you may ask. Well, that's because I didn't know about it until about 2:15 - an hour and a half after it started and nearly forty-five minutes after they got it put out! And my office is only about 1,000 feet from the Union!

I didn't notice a damn thing!

I only found about it when a friend who works across town emailed me to ask if the Union really was on fire. My response - "Huh?!?"

I was so wrapped up in what I was working on that, with the exception of grabbing things off the hall printer 3 or 4 times, I hadn't left my office since 7:00AM.

One of the most amusing/disturbing things with this whole thing had to do with ASU's notification system. After the Virginia Tech thing, ASU decided to set up a couple of notification systems to let students and staff know about emergencies. You could sign up for text message notifications, and if anything were to happen, ASU would send you a message. They also would send emails to addy of record for all students and staff.

We didn't get the email notification until 3:15. That's an HOUR after I found out about it! By the time they told everyone there was fire, it had already been out for 90 minutes!

And the sad part about this, myself and the other grad students in the department were too busy or so occupied that the fire was of interest for only about 10 or 15 minutes.

Happy Halloween!

To celebrate . . . Singing ZOMBIES!!!

Music is by Jonathan Coulton.

Quote of the Day

Idiot Box, n.: The part of the envelope that tells a person where to place the stamp when they can't quite figure it out for themselves. -- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"

Courtesy of an email from my father this morning!

Public Service Announcement #2

If you pay attention, and I know that's really hard for some of you, you'll notice that those little arrows on elevators light up. When the elevator arrives, if you look at that little arrow, it will tell if the elevator is going up or if it's going down.

If you do this, you won't have to look like an idiot by asking which way it's going!

A Public Service Announcement

This is directed at those who drive the I-10 in the Phoenix area.

As you drive out of Chandler on the eastbound I-10, you may notice that there are a bunch of Christmas decorations going up on the south side of the road. Let me assure you, you DON'T have to slow down to see what's going on!!!

These decorations are, in fact, a perfectly normal thing around here. They go up every year (although it seems a little earlier than usual this year) and they'll be up until after New Years. You will have plenty of time to see them as you drive by. And please rest assured that what you can see from the road can be seen just as well at 65-70 mph as at 10-15 mph. In fact, in some ways, they are better when seen at 65 or 70. That way it only takes you a second or two to see it all. When you're going 10 or 15, you have to spend most of your time checking on all the cars around you so you don't either get rear-ended or rear-end someone else.

For fuck's sake, they're just Christmas decorations! It's not like they're something you're never going to see again anywhere else in the world. And really, just how interesting are a bunch of fake trees and some over-sized fake packages? It's not like it's a bunch naked people running around, juggling flaming chainsaws or anything really cool like that.

The Art of Being a Bastard

As I have said, I do actually enjoy being a bastard at times. It is not something to be done indiscriminately, however. The whole thing with my roommate the other night got me thinking about the way I respond to problems like this. I have come to conclusion that I will pursue reasonable solutions to problems for only so long. I give people the chance to respond in an appropriate fashion. I will give people multiple opportunities to respond. At a certain point, however, I say "fuck it" and take a more "creative" approach to problem solving.

But there are three forms of bastardness. The first is the kind I used on my roommates. It is very clearly being a bastard, but a slightly indirect fashion. This form has a very specific target, and is applied to a very specific end.

For example, during the course of my first year as a graduate student, one of the grad students did a series of things which angered a number of us. They accused some of our colleagues of being stupid because they did not speak up in class very often, and declared that they did not want to work with these people on a group project (the groups were put together by the professor for the class who is also the director of our program, and he only assigned the groups after observing people over the course of most of the semester - he basically told her "too bad, get over it, go to work"). Both of the people in question here happen to be good friends of mine, who I knew to actually be far more intelligent than this person. She also made some disparaging remarks about the rest of us because most of us because we were younger than her, and since she had "real world experience" and we did not, she was in a better position to tell us how to be grad students (despite the fact that this was her first year, too!) and how to live our lives. Yeah, didn't go over so well with us. The next semester, I had my chance to be a bastard. We had another class with a group project. I ended up being on one of the "committees" with her. Over the course of the project, I found out that she hadn't really done anything for any of the committees she was on. As part of final report for this project, we had to write up a short paragraph on what each of did to contribute to the project. I had assumed editorial control over compiling this final report and had asked everyone to send my their little write up. She didn't. After several requests, I reached the "fuck it, I'm going to be a bastard" point and wrote it myself. I gave her name and said she "reported to be on the following committees". And that was it. Everyone else's write had information on which committees they worked on, what specific duties they carried out, etc. It became very clear to the people we were presenting this report to that she hadn't done jack shit. It took a while, and was done in a fairly subtle fashion, but I was able to play the bastard.

This form of bastardness must be used very carefully, however. It must well planned and carried out in such a fashion that it hopefully prevents further or escalated problems. It also must be done rather sparingly. If you are this kind of bastard all the time, it begins to lose it's effect. People just end up saying "yeah yeah, whatever" and ignoring it. This defeats the point of being a bastard. The entire purpose of being this first form of a bastard is to achieve a specific goal. It is most effective when people don't necessarily see it coming. It lets them know you are serious. When it works, it works beautifully. When it doesn't, things get bad. If you do it sparingly, and plan your approach right, you will succeed without too much fallout or collateral damage.

The second form is really just being a bastard for the sake of being a bastard. There is very little planning involved and it is a response to a specific situation, applied on the spur of the moment. This is blocking out someone who is trying to speed ahead in a construction zone. It's just responding in a bastardly fashion because you can. If you want an example, check out this Anywhere But Here strip. (I hope Jason Siebels doesn't mind me using one of his comics, but it really is just a perfect depiction of my point!)

The third form is is my favorite and most used form. But this is usually only carried out on friends in appropriate situations. Again, it is being a bastard for the sake of being a bastard. There is no real malice behind it. It's just giving your friends shit.

I Win

I have spent much of the last ten hours or so (at least, the hours I was awake) contemplating the Art of Being a Bastard.

A few months back, I picked up some new roommates. And there has be a . . . breaking in process involved. From everything I can tell, based on what they've said and what they've done, this is the first time that either of them have lived away from home. This despite this fact that they are both in their early to mid 20s. Until now, I think, they have always had someone to take care of them.

Well, I'm not their mommy. And I fucking shouldn't have to be. They are perfectly old enough to be able to function as adults in a shared apartment space. Most of the time, the things they've been doing have been fairly minor in the grant scheme of the universe. But it's my apartment - they just live there. I'm the only one on the lease, and they rent from me. I explained my basic rules when they moved in. Things like keeping music/movies turned down at night (that whole trying not to piss off the neighbors thing), putting their dirty dishes in the dishwasher and no the sink does NOT cut it, wiping up spills and crumbs from the kitchen counter, floor, and dining table, if you borrow one of my DVDs return it promptly and put it back in the right spot (not that hard when they're all in alphabetical order). Little things. I do not expect perfect cleanliness. I can't manage that, why should I expect it from them?

Well, they haven't done these things. So, I tried talking to them. When that didn't work, I took to leaving notes. What that too failed, I moved into Bastard Mode. I took to placing dirty dishes and the trash they left out in their doorway (if you haven't figured it out, they are a couple and are sharing a single room). If this didn't work, my plan was to threaten to hire a cleaning crew and charge them for it. Fortunately, I don't think it's going to come to that. One of them confronted me last night about leaving stuff outside their door. My response was simply "Well, pick it up in the first place I won't have to." At which point I explained that the glasses and trash I had placed there that morning (it was now about 9:30 at night) had been sitting on the table for 3 or 4 days at this point.

The mere fact that it has annoyed them to point of confronting me means that they are finally starting to get the message. They now understand that I can be a bastard and I will make sure that do these things one way or another.

I. Win.

It is not that I especially enjoy being a bastard. Okay, I actually do enjoy it, but I do not like being forced into being a bastard. If I am going be one, I want to make it a deliberate choice to do so. And while there is a whole philosophical argument that I always have a choice, I'm not going to go into that. The point is that I hate it when I feel compelled to act a certain way because of the particular situation. It this case, I had the choice of: (1) ignoring the situation - which would have been a good choice because that would just add to my stress level, and I really don't need that and neither do the people around me; (2) continuing to play mommy and leave them notes asking them to pick their stuff - also not a good choice because that will only result in me being pissed off, again not good for me or the people around me; or (3) be a Bastard - it may not really reduce my stress, but at least I'll be having some "fun" in the process. I took option #3.

I actually have a philosophy on the Art of Being a Bastard. But as this post is already getting fairly long, I'll save that for maybe this afternoon or tomorrow.

Priming the Pump

I was just pumped for information!

I don't know if I've mentioned it before or not, but I serve as a commission member for my local historic preservation committee. This is actually pretty impressive, given that I am still fairly young in terms of my professional career. I haven't been at this all that long and I'm already serving on a semi-judicial governing body. Pretty cool, huh?!?

Anyway, recently, we lost our Historic Preservation Officer (HPO) to another city in and another state, which means the city is in the process of trying to hire a new HPO. As it turns out, I know at least one, more like two, of the candidates. And he stopped by my office this morning to "chat".

Knowing this person the way I do, I can say that his intent was not really to try and get information out of me on other possible candidates or on how the committee was going to go about our business. But I can tell that he was hoping I would let something slip! It was a very passive-aggressive approach to the whole thing, really. But still slightly amusing!

Naturally, I realized what was going on and didn't say anything that he couldn't have found out through other means, so I'm the clear there. But really, how oblivious does he think I am? Did he honestly think that I wouldn't see what he was doing right away?

I know I've admitted to being a cynic before, so you can believe when I say that I was rather expecting something like this at some point. While I've not seen an actual list of people who have applied for the HPO job, by keeping my ear to the ground and by simply walking in the circles I do, I've heard of some of the people who were considering applying. And I know several of them. I'm actually rather surprised that it took this long. I mean, I am rather easy to bribe - a beer or two is usually all it takes!

Lack of Posts

I know, it's been almost two weeks since I last posted anything. If I said I really did mean to post, can I be forgiven? Things have just been really bust around here the last few weeks and I simply couldn't find the time to sit down and write for even a few minutes - or at least not when I had energy enough to write.

The reason I've been so bust recently is that last week was the National Trust for Historic Preservation annual conference. As I'm just about the point of needing a real job (now there's a rather frightening thought, me a professional!), I decided that this year would be a good one to attend the conference and network. Unfortunately, since the conference ran all of last week and since I'm still a grad student, that meant I had NO extra time the week before last. I needed to not only get all my work for last week done before I left, I wanted to get as much of my work for the first part of this week done as well. Didn't get all of what I wanted done, but got enough that I could go to the conference with a (mostly) clear conscience.

The conference was fun, so it was all worth it. I got a chance to see St. Paul, MN, which I had never been to before, and the weather was quite nice. I went to some interesting sessions - even if I already knew most of what they were presenting. I had the chance to network with a bunch of interesting people, including the top two people from the historic preservation office I would really like to work for. Handed out a bunch of business cards and even a couple of resumes, which was good. Even if they don't really look at them right now, it means that if I end up applying for a job with one of them at some point, they are more likely to at least recognize my name - and name recognition is a great and good thing!

And best of all, Journey was able to get the time off and come along. I tell you, there's nothing quite like coming back from a day full of meetings to find a beautiful woman waiting for you! And it was really good be able to spend some real time together. We're both so busy that we don't get to spend as much time together as we would like. And even if I was gone for most of the day, we were able to have dinner together every night. And we had all of the weekend together, although a good chunk of Sunday was taken up with traveling.

That was actually one of the things I was going to write about before I left and never got the chance to - traveling. (We break from our regularly scheduled post for this important side-rant.) I have come to the realization that people love to tell you how go about traveling. Even if they have never been where you're going, they'll have some advice for you. And I'm quite sure that I am just as guilty of doing this as everyone else. When I told people Journey and I were headed to St. Paul, I got all kinds of recommendations on where we should stay (I already have booked the hotel), which airline we should fly (again, already done), what the weather was going to be like (that's what weather.com is for), and what it was going to be like. Telling some one what a place is like is kind of like trying to tell them what it's like to hang-glide - talk all you want, but they're not going to really know until they do themselves. And before you ask, no I've never been hang-gliding, and no, I'm not planning on it! (We now return you to our regularly schedule post, already in progress.)

Anyway, we had a good time. The conference was good, the chance to relax some was even better. And we only heard one person say "eh?" or "don-cha-know?" (our cab driver to the airport)!